Throughout our addiction excuses were something that came so naturally to us that we couldn’t even recognize them as excuses. Every chance we got we made an excuse to use. We used when good things happened. We used when bad things happened. We used when we were happy, sad, scared, excited, nervous, angry. We made excuses that someone else was the reason we used. We never took a look at ourselves and said that we used because we had a problem. Circumstances, people and places were the problem and that’s why we used, or so we thought.
After getting sober we saw that all those circumstances were not the reason we used. We realized we were and are powerless over alcohol and drugs. We are the problem, not the people around us, not the things happening in our life. The gift of sobriety allows us to see clearly that there are no excuses. No one or nothing forced us to use. By accepting that we are the ones who are responsible we can move forward in our lives and change for the better.
In case you didn’t know:
Chronic exposure to drugs of abuse disrupts the way critical brain structures interact to control and inhibit behaviors related to drug abuse. (http://www.nida.nih.gov/scienceofaddiction/)
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful that my old ideas are changing. Today I will be open to new ideas from my AA group. I pray that I may develop new ideas that work.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Hope
Hopelessness is a common feeling among people suffering from addiction. For years the feelings that we had were that this life was something to suffer through. Every day was the same, probably getting a little worse. It seemed in our minds that we were doomed.
When we give up, and ask for help, that feeling of some hope for ourselves begins. Some of us need to detox and go to a rehab, like Clearbrook. The process starts by acceptance and admitting that we have a problem. Once we give up and realize that drugs and alcohol are killing us we can begin. The feeling of hope, like everything else in recovery is a gradual process. If we find a sponsor and a home group in AA, it makes us part of something again. The friends that we have been looking for our whole life begin to develop. One of the greatest feelings is to know that someone else finally understands us and how we think. The people we get close to in AA and NA let us know that we aren't alone anymore. They let us know that at one point in their own lives, they felt just like we do. Then they tell us how they were helped out of that despair. If practiced as a way of life by us, our lives can be the same as theirs. Like yesterdays blog, this takes time.
Hope is bigger and better than any material thing we can obtain in our lives. We are on the path to repairing broken relationships with ourselves, our families, and with God.
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful for the pain of growth. Today I will be mindful of the saying, "no pain, no gain". I pray that I may accept the pain necessary for growth.
When we give up, and ask for help, that feeling of some hope for ourselves begins. Some of us need to detox and go to a rehab, like Clearbrook. The process starts by acceptance and admitting that we have a problem. Once we give up and realize that drugs and alcohol are killing us we can begin. The feeling of hope, like everything else in recovery is a gradual process. If we find a sponsor and a home group in AA, it makes us part of something again. The friends that we have been looking for our whole life begin to develop. One of the greatest feelings is to know that someone else finally understands us and how we think. The people we get close to in AA and NA let us know that we aren't alone anymore. They let us know that at one point in their own lives, they felt just like we do. Then they tell us how they were helped out of that despair. If practiced as a way of life by us, our lives can be the same as theirs. Like yesterdays blog, this takes time.
Hope is bigger and better than any material thing we can obtain in our lives. We are on the path to repairing broken relationships with ourselves, our families, and with God.
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful for the pain of growth. Today I will be mindful of the saying, "no pain, no gain". I pray that I may accept the pain necessary for growth.
Monday, February 14, 2011
T.I.M.E. Heals Wounds
When we first got sober some of us may have instantly wanted the people in our lives to trust us. We expected them to automatically forgive us for all the things we’d done while using. Maybe we even thought to ourselves, “I deserve for them to trust me because now I’m sober and I’ve changed.”
We quickly realized that we didn’t deserve their trust. We were irresponsible for so long. We lied, we cheated, we stole. Why should they think that we’d act any differently right away?
Those around us were right to second-guess us. We had not built any sort of trust back up. We owed it to them to prove, through our actions that we were worthy of their trust. It wasn’t easy. We couldn’t put any expectations on the ones we love. They deserved time and proof that we turned our lives around. We had to be patient with them because the more we pushed for their forgiveness the more we acted like the person who used drugs and alcohol and manipulated them so many times. The only thing that allowed them to trust us is TIME. It wasn’t easy to say the least. But seeing growth and change is a process and only happens through doing the next right thing. Eventually we regained their trust.
In case you didn’t know:
A survey by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) indicates that on average 13. 2% of all people 16 or older drove under the influence of alcohol and 4.3% of this age group drove under the influence of illegal drugs in 2009. In an average year 30 million Americans drive drunk and 10 million drive impaired by illegal drugs
Daily Gratitude
I am grateful I am able to trust. Today I will put my trust in God's hands. I pray that I continue to trust God with all my problems.
We quickly realized that we didn’t deserve their trust. We were irresponsible for so long. We lied, we cheated, we stole. Why should they think that we’d act any differently right away?
Those around us were right to second-guess us. We had not built any sort of trust back up. We owed it to them to prove, through our actions that we were worthy of their trust. It wasn’t easy. We couldn’t put any expectations on the ones we love. They deserved time and proof that we turned our lives around. We had to be patient with them because the more we pushed for their forgiveness the more we acted like the person who used drugs and alcohol and manipulated them so many times. The only thing that allowed them to trust us is TIME. It wasn’t easy to say the least. But seeing growth and change is a process and only happens through doing the next right thing. Eventually we regained their trust.
In case you didn’t know:
A survey by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) indicates that on average 13. 2% of all people 16 or older drove under the influence of alcohol and 4.3% of this age group drove under the influence of illegal drugs in 2009. In an average year 30 million Americans drive drunk and 10 million drive impaired by illegal drugs
Daily Gratitude
I am grateful I am able to trust. Today I will put my trust in God's hands. I pray that I continue to trust God with all my problems.
Back to the Basics
For people in recovery, the basics are of utmost importance. As time passes and we get sober, things in our lives start to come together. We are working the steps and we are helping other people that are just coming in. Life has started to have meaning for us. We are able to be good employees and loving family members. It is so easy, as the literature says "to rest on our laurels". Right after that sentence it says, "alcohol is a subtle foe".
The programs of AA and NA are built and designed in 24 hour blocks. It is vital to our recovery to remember where we started. We started with Step One. The easiest way to remain in good balance is to practice the first three steps of the program on a daily basis. When things get tough, as life does for all of us, God is in charge. He will handle it, whatever it is, if you let him.
Although we are always going to make mistakes, the first 3 steps will save our lives. It can keep us in good emotional balance. When practiced on a daily basis this becomes our solution to all problems.
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful that my feelings do not get hurt as easily as they once did. Today I will not allow anyone to hurt me. I pray that I will not be hurt by the words or acts of others
The programs of AA and NA are built and designed in 24 hour blocks. It is vital to our recovery to remember where we started. We started with Step One. The easiest way to remain in good balance is to practice the first three steps of the program on a daily basis. When things get tough, as life does for all of us, God is in charge. He will handle it, whatever it is, if you let him.
Although we are always going to make mistakes, the first 3 steps will save our lives. It can keep us in good emotional balance. When practiced on a daily basis this becomes our solution to all problems.
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful that my feelings do not get hurt as easily as they once did. Today I will not allow anyone to hurt me. I pray that I will not be hurt by the words or acts of others
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Our Moral Inventory
"Made a Searching and Fearless Moral Inventory of Ourselves"
The fourth step is spoken about a lot in meetings all over the world. Often times we hear about how hard it was, how so many people avoided doing it all together. Then we hear that they didn't achieve sobriety. Many people try to sidestep this one or take "half measures".
This step is crucial to sobriety. This step is the truth about ourselvess, about our past. We drank, we thought, because of the taste or the way it made us feel. The question to ask is "why did we always have to feel different? Why did we always need to change that?" Most of us drink and use to escape. This step will help you find out what you are escaping from. How do we fix things that made us drink and use if we don't know what to fix?
We have placed our own desires and our own instincts above all else. That was all we knew. Remember, what we are attempting to do is find out the reasons and the corrections to our past life. To try and align our will with Gods will. Thinking about this doesn't work. Putting our thoughts and defects on paper "lays it out on the table".
Looking at our past can be difficult. It can be painful. It is a humble step though. We are making the attempt to correct our behaviors. We are making an attempt to live happily in this world.
How has the Fourth Step transformed your life?
The fourth step is spoken about a lot in meetings all over the world. Often times we hear about how hard it was, how so many people avoided doing it all together. Then we hear that they didn't achieve sobriety. Many people try to sidestep this one or take "half measures".
This step is crucial to sobriety. This step is the truth about ourselvess, about our past. We drank, we thought, because of the taste or the way it made us feel. The question to ask is "why did we always have to feel different? Why did we always need to change that?" Most of us drink and use to escape. This step will help you find out what you are escaping from. How do we fix things that made us drink and use if we don't know what to fix?
We have placed our own desires and our own instincts above all else. That was all we knew. Remember, what we are attempting to do is find out the reasons and the corrections to our past life. To try and align our will with Gods will. Thinking about this doesn't work. Putting our thoughts and defects on paper "lays it out on the table".
Looking at our past can be difficult. It can be painful. It is a humble step though. We are making the attempt to correct our behaviors. We are making an attempt to live happily in this world.
How has the Fourth Step transformed your life?
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Facing Issues Head-On
It’s easy for us to run away from things. It’s easy to push people away especially the ones who don’t enable us. When things don’t go the way we want, we disappear emotionally and physically. When things get difficult we leave. In the heart of our addiction we don’t know how to face anything. Most of the time we can’t even face ourselves.
After we finally decide to get sober we look back on all of the running we did. At first we may feel guilt and shame but it is actually something we can be grateful for. We can now look back and know that now that we are in recovery and have chosen to be responsible for ourselves, we have a great example of how not to act. It is a great example of who we aren’t anymore and who we never want to be again. It shows us how we have grown. We are not the person we used to be when we were using.
We have learned that just because it is easier to run away, doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do. Now that we are sober and working the steps we can face things that we would have never faced in our active addiction. To be able to face things with strength and integrity is truly a gift to forever be grateful for.
In case you didn’t know:
The use of illegal drugs among Americans increased between 2008 and 2009 according to a national survey conducted by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). The National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH) shows the overall rate of current illegal drug use in the United States rose from 8.0 percent of the population aged 12 and older in 2008 to 8.7 percent in 2009. This rise in overall drug use was driven in large part by increases in marijuana use.
After we finally decide to get sober we look back on all of the running we did. At first we may feel guilt and shame but it is actually something we can be grateful for. We can now look back and know that now that we are in recovery and have chosen to be responsible for ourselves, we have a great example of how not to act. It is a great example of who we aren’t anymore and who we never want to be again. It shows us how we have grown. We are not the person we used to be when we were using.
We have learned that just because it is easier to run away, doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do. Now that we are sober and working the steps we can face things that we would have never faced in our active addiction. To be able to face things with strength and integrity is truly a gift to forever be grateful for.
In case you didn’t know:
The use of illegal drugs among Americans increased between 2008 and 2009 according to a national survey conducted by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). The National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH) shows the overall rate of current illegal drug use in the United States rose from 8.0 percent of the population aged 12 and older in 2008 to 8.7 percent in 2009. This rise in overall drug use was driven in large part by increases in marijuana use.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Honesty and Recovery
A key component in recovery is honesty. When we come into the rooms of AA and NA, our lives seem to be in a giant knot. It's almost like a big ball of fishing line that is all tangled together. What we are trying to do is untangle that line. You will hear the words, "we have to get honest". The steps call for honesty. When we have finally given up, and we want help, the first step many of us took was to find a sponsor. The relationship between a sponsor and a sponsee is very powerful. This is a person that we can finally trust, a person we can tell what we've done, our fears, and our defects. When we talk about our past, and at times it can be hard, we are merely just telling the truth. The truth about ourselves finally sets us free. It is a rallying point, a starting block to recovery. When the truth comes out, the healing can begin. Without the truth we can't be helped because the help we seek is being steered in the wrong direction.
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful that I can share my feelings at meetings. Today I will work at sharing how I feel. I pray that I stay open and sharing.
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful that I can share my feelings at meetings. Today I will work at sharing how I feel. I pray that I stay open and sharing.
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